Saturday, 15 May 2010

MUMMY MISSION – YOUR FIRED

This day has been written in my stars for a while now; well that’s what I believe anyway. But until now I just didn’t realise how many people it takes to actually terminate one person’s contract.
There was the Vice Principal – his job was to tell me my rights and apparently he is the only person who can terminate contracts.

Then there was HR lady – her job was to give advice to the vice principal (and not very well if I may add) she spent most of her time fumbling with her paperwork.

Then there was the Line Manager – her job was to hand me the tissues as it was quite an emotional meeting.

Then last but not least there was the Head of my department – not even sure why she was there but still it made a tiny room look very full.

With my cuppa in hand I was lead into a tiny room, were I was basically told because I couldn’t return to my post, after suffering from a nightmare year my contract would now be terminated.

I felt like an apprentice being fire by Sir Alan Sugar, I almost wish I was he is so much more entertaining to watch than the fab four I had to put up with! The meeting was quick and simple; I was told that my contract was being terminated due to the fact that they could not offer me another position within the company.

There were a few tears; maybe it was sheer relief that I was finally free after 6 years. But I think they may have been tears of sadness as after 6 years I had made some amazing friends and I was going to miss them very much.

But three days on I’m now convinced that this day was written in my stars, as I want bigger and better things for my future, and do you know what it might have just happened.

Tuesday, 11 May 2010

IT’S MUM’S FAULT

The Mission kids are definitely testing me at the moment; I think there might be something in the air affecting all kids and not just mine. But still it seems that every time they forget something or something happens it’s simply not their fault, not in the slightest. So who is to blame for them forgetting that they had PE that day, well it seems it was ALL MY FAULT!

Take yesterday for an example, just a typical day in the Mission house then:

Teenage Mission comes home from school “Mum YOU forgot to get my cookery stuff” well if you don’t tell me I can’t get it, his reply “it was written in my homework folder” Hmmmm still can’t see why this is my fault. But I obviously missed the lesson were mums are supposed to riffle through 12 year olds school bags and look in their homework folder to see what he has got the next day.

SO LESSON 1 LEARNT: I MUST CHECK IN TEENAGE MISSIONS HOMEWORK FOLDER AND SEE WHAT HE HAS GOT FOR THE WEEK AHEAD, AND MAYBE HE WOULD LIKE ME TO DO HIS HOMEWORK FOR HIM AS WELL?

Then Drama Mission wanted a snack before she went to Tae Kwon Do, so off she went to make some toast: “Mum YOU burnt the toast” when actually she was making the toast not me, I wasn’t even anywhere near the kitchen for a change. But of course it was my fault because I’m responsible for everything that happens in the kitchen; after all it is MY KITCHEN!

LESSON 2 LEARNT: I MUST NEVER ALLOW ANYONE IN THE KITCHEN EVER, BECAUSE IN MY ABSENCE EVERTHING THAT HAPPENS IN THERE IS STILL MY FAULT!

AND THEN TO TOP IT OFF

Princess Mission told me “Mum YOU forgot my library book” after me handing her book bag to her just as we left the house. It seems it was still technically my fault because she was just zipping her coat up. Even though Thursday is Library book day, but she still insists on taking it every day!

LESSON 3 LEARNT: I MUST REMEMBER TO TAKE EVERYONES BAGS OUT TO THE CAR IN THE MORNINGS BECAUSE IF THEY FORGET ANYTHING, YOU CAN BE SURE TO HEAR THE WORDS:

MUM YOU FORGOT MY COAT/LUNCHBOX/PE KIT/BOOK BAG/ETC

The key word in that sentence is YOU, just incase YOU missed it.

It seems that I’m now not only responsible for running the Mission house and looking after the Missions running around this house, but I’m also liable for anything they forget to do, or forget to tell me to do.

So the morale of the story is us mum’s are NEVER meant to forget ANYTHING and if we do (because let’s face it we aren’t perfect all the time) then when we arrive at school, the children will make a point of telling the teacher that MUM FORGOT!

Monday, 10 May 2010

OH NO MUMMY IS SICK

Well today is all a bit chaotic, as Mummy Mission is sick. The normally organised and calm Mission house is in chaos and all because Mummy Mission dared to throw a sicky.

How dare I even allow a bug to get into my system and expect to be looked after by the rest of the mission household?   So I’m going to pick myself up and take some much needed pain relief to try and shake off this nasty tummy bug and almighty headache.   It’s not like I can stay in bed all day as I have little monster mission to look after.   Although he is playing nicely with his Happy Land set and watching the rather annoying Mr Tumble at the moment.

So my aim today is to not only get better, but to make up individual medicine boxes for the mission family, one for daddy mission, one for mummy mission, one for the grumpy teenager mission and one for the rest of the little missions.

MUMMY MISSION: Right my box is easy, will contain the basics as I’m never normally sick, so paracetamol, Ibuprofen, and Imodium (just incase), some of those migraine and headache patches for my head as I really don’t like taking painkillers unless I have too, some of that fancy optrex eye spray, a bottle of expensive bubble bath, a bottle of wine, a nice bar of chocolate for medicinal purposes you understand and some internet shopping.

DADDY MISSION: Right daddy’s box will have to contain the following, because any illness a man gets, is classed as deadly disease that is why they have to stay in bed for at least 3 days and use that stupid strained voice (you know the one). Any way apart from the obvious, paracetamol, Ibuprofen, lemsip’s, day & night nurse, and any other pills that they think might make them feel better. We must never forget, the vapour rub, the vapour plug in, the vitamin C pills, the large glass of pure orange juice, an extra blanket and the TV remote because they are truly never too sick to annoy you when they are channel hopping or watching some very dull programme that only men can ever find on the TV!

TEENAGE MISSION: Right he will need all of the above when ill, as he is a man in training. But also you will need to add the laptop close to the bed, his iPod touch close to hand, and not forgetting the Xbox switched on because god forbid he has to move anywhere, then there are unlimited drinks he will need, the additional box of man sized tissues because they can’t share and last but not least food and plenty of it, we can’t have them going hungry now can we.

LITTLE MISSION’S: Well their box is easy, some nice Calpol, and Ibuprofen medicine, a duvet one the sofa, with their favourite teddy bears and a nice warm cup of blackcurrant juice. Followed by an unlimited amount of either Cbebbies or Cbbc which ever little mission is sick and big cuddles off mummy mission because they always help.

So now I have decided what all the missions are going to need to get them through all the nasty bugs and diseases, I’m going to have to go shopping to make sure that every mission big or small is taken care of properly. But before I start to empty boots of its entire stock, I must tidy the house, do the washing, and the ironing that I left from yesterday because I may not have mentioned this before BUT I’M ILL. Ok now that is out of my system I’m off to boots.

IF ANYONE NEEDS URGENT HELP WITH MAN FLU THEN I HAVE ADDED A WEBSITE THAT CAN HELP YOU COPE!
http://www.manflu.org.uk/

Sunday, 9 May 2010

WHAT TO DO TODAY!

Well it’s a Sunday morning and oddly quiet at my house today. I’m sitting in the Conservatory the two youngest are up, and are normally running rings around me, mum can we have this, mum can we do that, but NOTHING! I’m off to investigate..... I see now one of the greatest inventions of the 21st century...Pepa Pig DVD, the wonders of the modern world. How nice that a small cartoon pig can keep my babies in a somewhat trance like state for a whole hour, I need more of these DVD’s.

My mum would have loved all of her five children to be quiet at the same time; I suppose you could say I’m lucky having four children, two aged 12 and 9 and two aged 4 and nearly 2. Someone once described it as having two sets of children, one set can do everything for themselves and the other set dependant on mummy and daddy for a little bit of help. But I refuse to describe my beautiful babies as a set; it makes them sound like foxes or is that badgers!

Anyway the sun is shining, daddy mission is at work Boohoo and I’m left with my little brood wondering what to do on this lovely day. Maybe a picnic...but the ground is wet; maybe a trip to the park...but the swings and slides will be wet! What to do then I came across this fabulous website called what to do with the kids, I took a peek and this is an amazing website that covers the whole country from Edinburgh to Devon and beyond, it has competition’s , vouchers off days out and so much more.

Every parent, grandparent, guardian, and carer should take a look at this fabulous website and I doubt you will ever be stuck on where to take your little ones and big ones on a day out again.

So it was, http://www.whattodowiththekids.co.uk/. go on take a look see what you think.

Or if you fancy a day at home, then Asda have amazing offers on at the moment on their Kids “grow your own” range. They can grow anything from Sunflowers to Strawberries, and it will keep them entertained for hours standing over their plants patiently waiting for them to grow.

Then maybe once they have planted and waited, maybe they can make some delicious cakes, muffins or biscuits check out http://www.kidsandcooking.co.uk/ they have some great ideas, from cooking with the children, to fussy eaters, to encouraging kids to cook.

Right well that’s me done, I’m off to follow some of my own advice and get outside whilst the sun is shining, catch you all later.