Thursday, 31 March 2011

The Day Buster Came To Play

We don’t have pets as a rule in the Mission house. Well let’s face it we have far too many kids to even contemplate another mouth to feed. We have had pets when the oldest two were little but, they didn’t last for very long.

I mean we had a Tortoise, called Maisey she was lovely and very tiny, but sadly her life came to a sad end after just 2 years.  She died of a nasty disease with a very long name, apparently when certain well know pet stores started selling these very expensive pets they failed to vet them properly and the whole batch was contaminated.  Meaning her poor life was doomed from the beginning, we have had 3 Hamsters, all vicious little buggers and a few Gold Fish which failed to make it back from the pet store.

Come to think of it I think we need to find a better Pet Shop.

Anyway, my grandparents have recently moved back to the UK after living in Ireland for a few years.  They have got the craziest dog in the world called Buster and Monster Mission adores him.

They play like they have known each other all their little lives, its amazing how quickly Monster too to Buster really.

So last week my Nan asked us to mind buster for a few hours whilst their Landlord came around to do some checks and repairs.  Monster was so excited; as soon as he woke up he told me what he was going to do with Buster.

“We will play on the slide and the swing and the trampoline” he announced over breakfast, as soon as we got back from school he demanded we went across the road to pick Buster up.

Woah, it was like having another child in the house, he was rushing about everywhere, sniffing and trying to get into places the kids don’t even attempt.

After 10 minutes of sliding on the laminate and bumping into the radiator Buster gave up and went in to the garden to play with Monster.

20 minutes had passed and I heard “oh dear, I’m telling my mummy off you”.  I went outside to investigate.  “What’s wrong?” I asked Monster.  “Buster has done a POO!” “That’s not nice is it mummy?” trying my hardest to explain to Monster that dogs really don’t care where they poo.

Trying to clean it up was the hardest part, oh THE SMELL! If you imagine changing another child’s bum when they have poo’d yep that’s what I was going through.

It was horrific, I can deal with most things but dog poo...Bleugh.

I managed to clean it up and then it was time for Buster to go home.  I felt that sense of relief, you know the one when they mischievous child had been for a play date and you can’t wait for them to go home...Yep that one.

Monster and I sat in the garden and we talked about getting a pet dog.  “so Monster shall we get a dog like buster?” he looked at me like I had two heads.

He turned to me and said “Mummy are you kidding?” “That dog poo’d in the garden, on my trampoline and he wouldn’t go down my slide...No thanks”

Later on that evening when Princess arrived home from school, Monster took great pleasure showing her all the things that Buster had done.  Horrified by the thought he had poo’d in the garden Princess came in and asked for some “diffinfectand”  “what’s that lovely?” I asked.

She pointed to the cupboard under the sink. “Its in there” I was with her now, she wanted the Zoflora Disinfectant from under the sink.  “Why do you want it?” I asked. “So we can clean the grass, the baby wipes just don’t work” she replied.

Looking a bit confused, I went outside to see what they had been up to. Oh dear, they had only gone and started cleaning the patch of grass, that Buster poo’d on with a whole pack of baby wipes.  Oh well at least the grass was clean.

Tuesday, 29 March 2011

Alternative Easter

Easter is a fab time of the year, Chocolate egg's, Easter Bonnets and Hot Cross buns.  This year i have made it my Mission to find alternative Products for easter.  Egg's are great but very boring sometimes so here are my top five finds:

  1. The Easter Chocolate Pizza,  Now i was given one of the Normal Pizza's to review and it was amazing.  Looking over at @boxchoc website the other night for inspiration they have an amazing Easter Pizza.

  2. Marshamallow Kebab: this was an amazing little find at our local Home and Bargin store.  Its little chick's and spring lambs all on a stick.  The kids loved these and they are adorable.

3. Next has to be gorgeous Jelly Lollies, you can get them at any Wilkinsons, Poundland and Home and Bargin stores and the kids love a bit of Jelly.

4. As a special Easter treat, Haribo have brought out a [lastic egg filled with some of their favourite treats.  These are a fab alternative to chocolate.

5. Lastly has to be some amazing little Sherbet egg's.  Still in keeping with the theme of Easter, but watch out for the Fizz.

So thats it that is my alternative Easter.If you have a good look around your local High street you may find some more anazing alternative to the chocolate egg.

HAPPY EASTER (well almost)



DISCLAIMER:  No one has asked me to review these products and i have not recieved any of these products in return for writing this post.

Friday, 25 March 2011

Project 365 - Day 4

This is technically Daddy Missions baby.  His Name is Oscar Van and he is a 1966 Split Screen VW Campervan.  Thsi makes me smile every time i think of the special trips we have made in this little van.

Thursday, 24 March 2011

Project 365 - Day 3

This little Monster, has the ability to make me smile no matter what he does.  He makes me proud everyday.

Project 365 - Day 2

My Super Star Grandad carved these birds and they take pride of place in the garden.  Its funny to watch the other birds stop by and start talking to them.

Project 365 – Things That Make Me Proud.

I know I have left it a bit late to join in Project 365, as we are already in March.  So I decided to join from one of the most important days of my life 22nd March 2011.  Not only did all of my dreams come true this day as I became a PUBLISHED writer, but it was also the day of my 8th Wedding Anniversary.

My Project 365, will be about the positive things in my life, things that make me smile, People who make me proud and everything else along the way.

Project 365 - Day 1

This is me, the 22nd March 2011, the day all of my dreams came true.  You can check out all the lastest, news, views, reviews and celebrity gossip over at the brilliant

Check us out today. Xxx

Saturday, 19 March 2011

One Word!

I seem to have been tagged by the lovely Vicky who is also @mumfordnsons85 the theme of this Meme is One Word.

Now me, I struggle to find one word every day so I hope you lot are better at this than I am.

I asked the family first, just so I wasn’t left with no one responding to this request.  I asked Daddy, can you describe me in one word? I could see his mind working overtime his response “Mummy” Well he is right I suppose.

So off I went and asked the kids:

Teenage Mission answered “Bank” well hmmm I have been called worse things.

 Drama Mission answered “Caring” that’s more like it (she got a cuddle)

Princess not wanting to miss out on cuddles answered “lovely” (she got big cuddles too)

Now for my hardest task getting Monster to describe me in one word.  This little man is going through the final months of his terrible two’s so he could come out with anything really.

Monster answered “boobies” well it could have been worse I suppose.

So now it’s your turn ONE WORD, go on how would you describe this Mummy.

Please try to be nice. 


Mummy x

Friday, 18 March 2011

I love what i do.

I consider myself to be one of the lucky ones.  Not having to commute to work every day, no traffic jams, no office politics, no boss to scream and shout at me.  Someone asked me a few days ago what I love the most about working from home.

I didn’t have to even think about it, I had a million and one things running around my head so here are my top 10 things I love about working from home:

  1. In the summer I can take my laptop out into the garden and work.  Not only is this beneficial to my own well being, but i can think back to those days when I worked in stuffy offices with no air conditioning.  I can also have a sneaky ice lolly because no one is watching me (well except for that dodgy neighbour)

  2. I no longer have to worry about the washing, if it’s sunny I can step away from my desk and put the washing out and if it starts to rain I can step away from my desk and bring it back in.

  3. I never get to work and think “Shit, I forgot to put the bin out” or “Crap, I forgot my lunch”

  4. I can work wherever I want to.  In the conservatory, in the kitchen, in the garden or even in Asda!  Yep that’s right folks with the art of modern technology I have the ability to answer emails, even when I’m doing my weekly shop.

  5. Distractions, there are hundreds of them every day in the office.  At home I have none, well apart from little monster but he is a welcome distraction.  I don’t have to get caught up in the office bitch fest and I certainly don’t have to worry about getting caught by the office creep!

  6. Childcare fee’s, these were the Bain of my life.  I seemed to be working just to pay these, no more!  I can do both school runs and be there in the holidays.  Even when the school calls to say little Princess is sick I can go without the worry of a boss breathing down my neck.

  7. A little siesta, these were never possible in the office and only ever possible now if monster is poorly as he never sleeps in the day.  But just to curl up on the sofa and have a 10 minute power nap, wow it really does work.

  8. Office wardrobe, in the office these consisted of either a smart uniform or a simple dress code.  Not on my watch my office dress code is anything from PJ’s, hoodies and jeans, or baggy jumpers and leggings and maybe the odd pair of tracksuit pants.  Unless I’m meeting with a client or networking then it’s back to smart and sensible.

  9. Working whenever I want to.  I suffer from insomnia from time to time, so I will put this time to good use by finishing clients files, sorting out my own paperwork or even doing a bit of blogging.

  10.  The greatest thing about working from home is the freedom. I can eat and drink at my desk, I can talk to my sister on the phone, I can work from the local coffee shop if I need some fresh air, I can be as creative as I want to be with my work and no one will tell me I can’t do it, I can nip to the park for a game of footie with monster as long as I have my phone with me for important emails, I can do whatever I want and I LOVE IT.

So that’s it all those things above are all the things I love because I am extremely lucky enough to be able to work from home.  There are downsides, but the ups outweigh the down.

I have always wanted to be able to work from home, we could never afford for me to be a SAHM, so I had to work for the sake of my family, but now I do work from home and I love what I do.

check us out at

Bad Mummy Club - Bad Mother - Welsh Mum

A big warm welcome to our Bad Mummy club today to the lovely @welshmumwales  who has a fab little blog so let the plea begin.

A bad mother

When I received the honour a couple of days ago and was asked to do a blog post about being a bad mother.  At first I have to be honest I was absolutely thrilled and then panic began to set in and I questioned, ‘Am I really a bad mother?’ ‘How awful to be placed in that category!’

I suppose the answer is really that it depends how you feel about yourself and it is really only you that can truly quantify this status. The way I feel woe betide any mother criticising another mother about being a bad mother, they absolutely have no right it is hard enough as it is.  We all suffer different challenges on a daily basis as it is and quite frankly who are we to judge?

So here goes, the reasons why I think that I am a bad mother:

* I did not give birth naturally, it was via a caesarean on both occasions.

* I went back to work when both my children were 6 months.

* I work hard and often don’t get home in time to put my children to bed.

* My children say to me on a daily basis, mummy can you take me to school.  Unfortunately, I can’t – bad mother!!

* We can’t invite children over to play after school, as I am not home in time.

* I have sent my children into Nursery when they are not 100% so at least I’ll get a few hours in work and not lose my job and then wait for the phone call!

* I have given my children Nurofen to go into Nursery and not told Nursery!

* I have demanded a lot off my Nursery as I am paying for it and also I feel guilty about leaving my children there.

* I let me children wear clothes which are obviously too small for them as I haven’t got the time or money to buy new ones

* I have given my children chocolate for breakfast

* I kept my daughter in pull-ups to go to bed because I couldn’t bear the thought of getting up mid night to change beds.

Thursday, 17 March 2011

Mummy's got a secret - Brew Drinking Thinkings!

Mummy has been leading a double life and now is the time to come clean.  No I’m not really a middle aged man! I have found it so hard to keep this a secret, but here goes I am *drum roll*



Brew Drinking Thinkings


Brew Drinking Thinkings, or BDT to those in the know, is a magazine style uber-blog compiled by some of the best blogging greats from around the web. The aim is to create a central hub where women who don't get a lot of time due to work or parenting, for example, can get the best of the blogosphere and the internet in one place. Features will also include craft classes, service booking systems and shops as well as articles and feature posts. 

It has been so hard to keep this a secret.  We launch on the 21st March so make sure you are all registered.  We have @BrewDrinkThink Twitter page and a fabulous Facebook Page.

So what are you all waiting for?  Pop over and register, follow us on Twitter and like us on facebook.  We wouldn’t want you to miss out on any of the gossip now would we.

Tuesday, 15 March 2011

Monster and the old Man

Kids have this unbelievable knack of saying the wrong things at the wrong times.  Well maybe not the wrong things.  It’s just case that they haven’t heard the saying engage the brain before you open your mouth. I'm guilty of this too you know.

Take Little Princess for a prime example, she is always doing it.

We were once in Asda, browsing in the cake aisle (as you do) when princess spotted a lady that was a little over weight shall we say.  She was buying weight watchers cakes.  Princess looked at me and announced to the whole aisle “why is that lady buying low fat cakes?” trying hard to shut her up I told her “maybe she is on a diet” Princess shook her head and said “don’t you think it’s a bit late for that” .  We made a quick exit from the cake aisle.

Another example was a quick trip to boots, Princess again.  We were looking at the skin care when a nice man who was dressed as a lady (politically correct term fails me) was also looking at wrinkle creams. Holding no punches, Princess said “Mummy, why is that man dressed as a lady?”  The lady/man looked at me, I couldn’t explain.  So I said “well people dress in different ways sweetie.”  Thinking she would be happy with that explanation, we moved down the aisle, but no that wasn’t good enough for Princess as she went on to say “well if he wants to be a lady, he should have had a shave first!”  Oh ground open up please, biting my lip trying hard not to burst out laughing, we moved out of the aisle.

Princess still not content, with the lady/man.  She told the shop assistant “There is a man dressed as a lady over there; you should show him were all the lady stuff is because he isn’t fooling anyone”.

Kids also have a knack of repeating things you really didn’t think they heard you say.

Like one of my neighbours, is well let’s say has a very lived in face.  When talking to the neighbour one day, Princess again was staring at this neighbour, so much so the neighbour stopped talking to me and asked Princess was she ok?

Princess replied “yes I’m fine thank you; I am just looking to see what lives in your face?” Pardon the said neighbour replied “well my mummy said you had a lived in face and I just wanted to see what lived in it?”  Bright red and full of apologise, explaining she overheard me talking about someone else with the same name as her.

I couldn’t get away quick enough.

So you can imagine my surprise, when this morning Monster started to copy his sisters knack of dropping mummy in it.

Walking home from school, we have a lot of older people who always say good morning and smile.  So when a rather grumpier old man walked towards us, Monster was quick to comment “Look at the state of his face?” praying he wasn’t talking about the grumpy old man I asked “who’s face sweetie?”  “His face” he shouted pointing at the man walking towards us.  I couldn’t look the man in the eye.  I told monster it was rude to point and shout, he said “well look at him the miserable bugger”.

I could have died!

I have a few more years yet before Monster and Princess grow out of this not engaging the brain process, so until then I will be keeping them under lock and key.

Lots of love

Mummy x

Monday, 14 March 2011

The Teenage Years

They say when you have your first child that they will always be your baby and it’s very true.  This year my baby turned 13. *starts sobbing* Yes that’s right Teenage Mission actually became a TEENAGER!

Everyone warned me that my life would now resemble a scene from Kevin and Perry, he would wander around with his knuckles scraping on the floor and I would have to learn a whole new language of grunts and moans.

So I waited...Nothing.  What was I expecting, my lovely mild mannered son to turn into an alien? Well yes pretty much.  The day came and went still nothing, maybe he was a faulty one?  Maybe this wasn’t going to happen to my son?

A week passed by and he was still pretty normal, maybe he was part of a faulty batch of teenagers.  Maybe they left out the moody Teenager button?

I looked through some pictures, his hair was long, but it had been that way since he was 11.  His speech was pretty normal, one grunt for yes, two for no...All normal.  He spends hours on computer games and refuses to do his homework...Still normal.

Then it dawned on me, being 13 didn’t make him a teenager, he had been one since he was 11.  Good god why didn’t I see the signs he went from this

To this from the ages of 10 to 11.  God what a difference a year makes.

He had grown up, my baby was no more.

I remember the first time I laid eyes on all 8lb 12 oz of him.  He wasn’t a chunky baby; he was very long and had a great appetite, something’s never change.

I remember looking at him thinking “I made you”.  He was the most perfect little man in the whole wide world.  He has had his moments, try feeding every 2 hours from birth, not sleeping until he turned 3 and don’t get me started on the accidents.

At the age of 4 months he decided to test my motherly skills by contracting German measles, he was sent for blood tests and was prodded and poked by countless doctors.  One good thing to come out of it was the doctor said his immune system would be amazing and he would never get normal childhood illnesses.  That bit was true he was the only child from a class of 20 not to get chicken pox.

At the age of 2, his clever daddy decided to let him play with some pennies and guess what?  Yep he swallowed a five pence piece, back to the hospital.  We were told to watch out for it in his nappy for 24 hours, yep that was my job to find it.

After that he grew up fairly normally, we had the trapped hands in the deck chair incident, the split head open on the fire place, oh and the bee sting in the Adams apple incident.  But yer mainly ok.

That was until he turned 12, this was the worst year of my little baby’s life.  He fell during a training session at Tae Kwon do and he went for a routine x-ray.  That’s when they found it; he had a mass in his right knee muscle. The doctors told us that it was pieces of cartilage breaking away from between his knee caps and attaching itself to his thigh muscle.  It was around about this time he was getting really bad pains, in every joint.  They would get hot, swell up and he would find it incredibly difficult to even walk.

I watched my lively little black belt go from active man to elderly man in 2 weeks.  Whatever it was, it was taking over his body at such a fast rate.  He had every test going and they still couldn’t find out what was causing the pain.

After visiting a specialist at our local children’s hospital we were told that it was because his cartilage between his knee caps was creating a fluid and this in itself was affecting his joints.

12 Months later and he is just getting back to his normal little active self, he still can’t play football or rugby, but at least he can move.  The Mass well we will be kicking its little ass out of his life as soon as he stops his current growth spurt. (he is 13 and 5”4 already).

My son, My Hero and he will ALWAY be my baby boy.

Friday, 11 March 2011

Bad Mummy Club - Can the next mummy please shuffle on forward?

Todays Bad Mummy joining our elite club is the lovely Emma over at @verynicethings who also has a lovely blog and an amazing website coming soon.

So lets see if this very busy mummy qualifies to join our Bad Mummy Club, bring on the Plea.

I here by announce on this blog my bid for bad mother status. It’s been a mad journey starting a business and looking after a fabulous, energetic two year old and here is my case for why I think I deserve my own quiet, wine drinking patch in BAD MUMMY CLUB.

Here is my case ;

1)      I crave quiet. Sometimes I just need 10 minutes peace. A time of stillness and nothing. Even if my daughter is quiet she is climbing on my head, pulling my hair, passing wind on my lap or (a fairly new one) giving me a wash like a cat would by licking her hands (possibly needed some might argue… then let me do it ALONE I say).

2)      I hate my cheery mummy voice – the sound of it drives me to distraction. Its not me (I’m naturally cynical, very sarcastic and not that upbeat ALL THE TIME).  Just the talking involved in getting shoes on, coat on and out the house drives me up the wall. Don’t get me wrong it would be spooky if all was quiet. But it seems that since my daughter can talk – I have developed a mother tongue I cannot stand – nothing like my normal standard which leads me neatly on to…

3)      Swearing. I have a mouth like a builder who has worked on building sites for years. Swearing is something I do (not proud of it – but it’s certainly a habit) and I confess that I try to curb it. But things just slip out. Recently after a particularly vocal getting ready for bedtime I noticed that I had not finished changing the bed. ‘SHIT, the bed!’ is now a phrase that my 2 year old takes delight in saying. Usually in quiet places.

4)      I am an amazing actress. It’s true. The uncountable amount of fake ‘phone calls’ I have made to the nursery to explain how naughty my daughter was being (much to her horror, as Miss Dawn and Miss Julie are not to be messed with ). If they were real phone calls my bill would be huge.

 “What’s that Miss Julie? You think she should eat her tea like a good girl and not chuck it on the floor? Or she won’t get to paint tomorrow? Ok I will tell her…”  I imagine you get the picture (Oscar winning potential)!

5)      I hate parent and toddler groups. I invent amazing excuses not to go or take up any invitations.  I know my daughter would probably LOVE it, but the thought of sitting in a village hall drinking crap coffee and eating a digestive whilst the kids fight over dog eared toys that really should be condemned is not my idea of a good time. I’m sure the mums are lovely (friends of mine swear they are just fantastic), but give me a free morning and I would rather go for a walk or feed the ducks … anything but that.

6)      Bribery and corruption are fast becoming features of the Blackman household. “Let me change your nappy and you can have a biscuit”, “If you eat your lunch you can watch Babe” the connections between bribe and task are irrelevant – which may lead to some interesting associations later in life…

7)      Wine #1 Sometimes I need a glass whilst she is watching In The Night Garden. Fact.

8)      Wine #2 Sometimes I let her drink water at the same time out of a plastic wine glass.

9)      Wine #3 If 1 & 2 are happening, we both clink our glasses together and say cheers.

Are we all agreed...*counts hands*  Welcome to the club your gold star is below.

Wednesday, 9 March 2011

Family Ties.

When little Princess came running out of school the other day she had a really important question to ask me.  I was thinking along the lines of “Mummy can we have sweets on the way home?” or “Mummy can Holly come for tea?” those sort of important questions.

Sadly not she asked “Mummy when are you and Daddy getting a DIVORCE?” *spits juice everywhere.*

“What?!!?” I asked (does this child know something I don’t?) Has Daddy been plotting a secret divorce behind my back and told the one person he knows, that would tell her mummy all her secrets in a heartbeat?

I start to check the bank statements...No abnormal behaviour so I sat Princess down for a little chat.

I asked princess why she thought mummy and daddy would ever get divorced, she went on to explain. Well someone I play with at school her mummy and daddy are getting a divorce and her mummy and daddy buy her lots of presents, so if you and daddy get one I can have lots of presents too.

I could see where she was coming from, it does sound appealing to a 4 year old.  Then she added that this little girl was getting a new step sister and brother and she wanted one too because they sound like fun.

I watched as her little mind raced through the whole situation, she thought a divorce was like winning the lottery (well for some people it is) after all you get rid of the dead wood you don’t particularly like anymore.

So I felt this was the time to explain to little princess how families can be a little different but they love each other all the same.

I explained that our family was a little different too. (How do you explain this to kids?) I explained that my daddy (her lovely granddad) wasn’t technically my daddy, “What do you mean?” her mind was racing again.

I explained that when myself and Auntie Paula were little our daddy went away to live with another family.  Then Nanny got married and had Auntie Hannah and Sarah and their daddy went away to live with another family.  The Nanny met Grandad and he loved us all so much he stayed forever and then got married.

Her little head looked like it was about to explode, she just sat there thinking...Wait for it!

“So Grandad isn’t your daddy?”  Yes he is, I explained because a real daddy loves you no matter what.  I went on to explain; just because a mummy and a daddy don’t love each other anymore doesn’t mean they don’t love their little children.

See my Daddy and Auntie Hannah’s Daddy never came back, they never called and they never sent birthday cards.  They were mean daddy’s (well I could have called them something else but she is only 4).  Whereas your friend is one of the luckiest little girls in the world because she has a mummy and a daddy that love her very much, but she also has a step mummy who also loves her lots too.

Here we go again...”So she has two mummy’s?”  Yes and the both love her lots and lots.

Finally she accepted that families were all different and it’s fine to be different.  Without a thought she gave me the biggest hug ever and said “Mummy I love you, and it’s ok I don’t want you and daddy to get a divorce” when I asked what had changed her mind she said “I would get very confused with too many mummy’s and daddy’s and I might forget to kiss one of them goodnight”

I have the upmost respect for Single Mummy’s and Daddy’s, Step parents and step siblings.  It’s hard enough growing up, but my gorgeous dysfunctional family make up for it.  I have never called my sisters “half sisters” because there simply not and I have always called my “step dad” DAD because that’s exactly what he is.

I have been asked in the past why, now I’m older do I still call him dad? And I will tell you what I tell them.  He has been there for me since I was 13 years old; he took on four little girls that weren’t his own.  He has loved us, wiped snotty noses, cleaned up sick and chased off terrible boyfriends just as a dad should and he will always be my dad.

In accordance with being politically correct I have 4 half sisters and a step dad, but who wants to be politically correct.  I have a mum and dad and four little sisters and I love them all the world and back again. (well sometimes)

So what if your family is different, so what if you have step brother, sisters, mums, dads and aliens (nope that’s just my family again) A family is a bond, a tie and they will be with you forever so be NICE.

God knows how I’m going to explain Elton John’s new baby.

Lots of love

Mummy xx

Saturday, 5 March 2011

Calm before the...Kids!

Silent Sunday

10 Things they don’t when you become a Mum - The School Years 4 - 11

The First Day:  This will consist of tears at the school gates and I’m not talking about the child.  As a parent you will shed tears when getting your child ready for school, on the way to school, at the school gates and even when they come home (but they are for different reasons).  You see your child first day at BIG school is a big occasion, after 4 years of tears, tantrums and drama’s, you will now get a bit of freedom from paying for childcare.

Friends:  At school your child will make many friends, they will come from a number of different back grounds and be all kinds of shapes and sizes and your child won’t care.  But beware every now and then when you ask your child the question “So who did you play with today?” Your child will say “NO ONE”.

What!  Your heart will sink into the pit of your stomach; you will start to imagine your poor child wandering around the playground all alone.  STOP! They are feeding mummy’s insecurities, of course they played with all of their friends as they did the day before and the day before that, they are playing mummy for a bit of sympathy.

Parties: Warning triangle, Primary school is the start of the “I want to invite the whole of the class parties” They won’t want to leave anyone out so be warned this will cost you, not just by your own child but from all the party invitations the child will receive.  TOP TIP: Go to your local Home & Bargain, Wilkinson’s or Pound land, get yourself a box and start to fill it with a mixture of boys and girls toys, that way you will never be caught out.

NITS: Whoa, now these little buggers will get EVERYWHERE, your house will look like a scene from an end of the world movie, you will all be smelling like toxic waste for a few hours, the bedding, towels and other items all have to be boiled washed and you and your children will smell like nit lotion for a week.

Parents Evening: A chance to meet your child’s teacher, a chance for her to be a little bit clever with the truth.  Teachers are clever, they can’t be seen to be criticising a child anymore, so if little Joe is a complete little sod in school they can’t tell you that.  Instead they will say something like “children all learn at their own pace” in other words “We can’t get him to do anything so we let him play all day”.

School Plays: One of the proudest moments in your life watching your little one up on the stage, even if they are just singing you will have a little tear in your eye and a hope that they won’t embarrass you AGAIN.  You know what I mean, kids don’t worry about being in front of 100 parents when they hitch their skirts up to fix their knickers or pump when it’s really quite and declare to everyone very proudly that it was them. You will slowly go a lovely shade of red and everyone will know that is YOUR child.

“Mum can so and so come for tea?”  That joyous sentence normally blurted out in front of the other and child and their mother, you will normally have the usual “not tonight darling we have to go out” ready and waiting.  But then your child will trip you up and expose your lies so you have to retreat and give in.

The one you don’t want them to play with:  As parents we all have a child we don’t want our kids to play with, he or she may always be in trouble at school.  Kids will ignore all your attempts to stop them from playing with this child so you had better hope they get fed up with the child before high school!

Childcare: This will cost you nearly all of your wages, it will be the cause of many sleepless nights and your child will either love it or hate it.

The School Term: Now every 6 weeks will come around very quickly indeed, the kids have more holidays than you can cope with (no wonder teachers are looking younger).  But there are terms that will cost you the most this is Christmas and summer term.  These are the terms when you generally buy presents for the teachers; ok a small box of chocolates and a cheap bottle of wine seem reasonable.  So when your child comes home from school with a list of gift he/she needs for their TEACHERS you will start to cry, you see they don’t generally just have one teacher these days they have two possibly three and then there are the teaching assistants, oh god it’s going to cost you!

There are so many more things I could have covered, there is the choosing of the high school, 11+, germs and illness the list is endless.  Someone once told me that school days are the best years of your life; I wish I would have listened more now, but I was at the back of the class playing at the time.

Lots of love

Mummy x

Friday, 4 March 2011

Bad Mummy Club - Week 4

Todays Bad Mummy Club post comes from the Lovely Hannah (who actually my little sis) she loved reading all your Bad Mummy Posts she wanted in on some bad mummy action.

So lets see if we should give this Little Mummy one of our gold stars:

Define a bad mum?

If giving him a bag of sweets and putting him in front of the TV with his favourite program (which I have on series link on my sky+ box) so I can steal 5 minutes to wash my hair, make and have a cup of tea or even just wash a few dishes then I am guilty as charged.

My son is 2 1/2, I work part time in a nursery and I am also 8 months pregnant. So whatever time I do get to myself (which if every mum sat down and worked it out it world probably add up to about an hour a day if we are lucky!) then I will do whatever it takes.

Being a mum is a full time job, we do days, nights, evening and weekends.   24 hours a day and regardless whether you are at work or on the loo if your child needs something then you are there.

I almost forgot to mention about the other child in my life my husband. We give into them just as much as the kids.

Don’t get me wrong I love being a mother and a wife

 I bake with my son

We go the park (regardless of the weather)

I read to him

I teach him his colours, shapes and numbers

We go the zoo, farm and the jungle gym

I love him unconditionally.

But on those odd occasions when I just don’t have the time or energy I GIVE IN.

Take night times for example my little treasure has never liked the word sleep.  What child does? And I know that he can get out of bed and come into my room in the middle of the night but it has got worse.  My night time consists of reading him a story then leaving him in his room to go to sleep most of the time he will just go off, but 4 nights out of 7 its back and forth putting him back to bed.

 Then I go to bed and I am just in a nice sleep when he comes in my room " mummy there’s a monster" i sleepily put him back to bed "there’s no monster sweet heart go back to sleep" I kiss him and tuck him back in then go back to bed. 10 min later " mummy mummy my need you to sit with me" "it’s time for bed now sweetheart go back to sleep mummy’s going to bed". This goes on and on untill about 4 in the morning when I snap and say "JUST GET INTO MY BED". I know, I shouldn’t but I need my sleep.

Then there are the dreaded meal times. OMG he was such a good eater when he was a baby i could give him anything and he would eat it but now it’s like a war. so I try and put good stuff on his plate but it’s just not that simple cause if that green stuff touches any of his other food he just won’t eat it. So I cheat with veggie fingers and carrot waffles (he will never know) But most of the time I give him whatever he will eat just to get him to eat anything.

So if all of this makes me a bad mum then where do I sign?


Tuesday, 1 March 2011

Chocolate Pizza - By Box Choc

If you could think of two things that would make a great night in you would think of Pizza and Chocolate, so when the lovely Carol at boxchoc offered to send us a Chocolate Pizza to taste test we jumped at the chance.

We waited patiently for the postman to arrive, and there he was with a big brown box.  After opening the box there inside was what can only be described as a work of art.  Eight individual slices of chocolate each with a different surprise what more could a girl ask for?

Working our way through the individual slices made our Saturday night complete.  Each slice was lovingly handmade and caused a few arguments over which one was the nicest slice.

The flavours include:

  1. Milk Choc Crunch.
    Milk chocolate with Coco Pops, topped with white chocolate sprinkles, Caramel Nibbles, Maltesers and Milky Way Stars.  This was one of the NICEST pieces of chocolate I had ever tasted and Monsters firm favourite too.

  2. Very Berry
    White chocolate (coloured pink) topped with sugar strands and dried cranberries.  This piece was creamy and very tasty and as it was pink, Princess Mission adopted this as her favourite.

  3. Dark Night
    Dark chocolate mixed with luxury mixed fruit, topped with crushed roasted nuts and a chocolate coated peanut.  Daddy Mission had this one covered, he said again the chocolate was smooth and it had that bitter taste that only good dark chocolate can deliver.

  4. Nut-tastic
    Milk chocolate with peanut butter chocolate swirls, topped with roasted crushed nuts and a chocolate coated peanut. Daddy again took over this one too, he is not normally a fan of milk chocolate but he loved the mixture of the Peanut butter and crushed nuts.

  5. Chocolate Dragon
    Dark chocolate flavoured with orange topped with chilli flakes.  Now none of us were too keen to taste test this slice as the flaked chilli’s put us off, but once we had all taste tested our pieces there was a fight over who would get more.  The taste was amazing with the dark chocolate and orange and the chilli flake made the slice a work of art.

  6.  Caramel Dream
    Milk chocolate with white chocolate caramel swirls, topped with Toblerone pieces and Crunchie Rocks.  Teenage Mission adopted this as his favourite piece, he said the chocolate was creamy and the added swirls of caramel made his day.

  7.  White Wonder
    White chocolate, topped with milk chocolate sprinkles, White Maltesers, Snow Bites and Mini Eggs. This had to be Drama Missions favourite piece as she is our White chocolate expert, she loved everything about it and then moaned she wanted a whole pizza made just out of White Wonder.

  8.  Minty Magic
    Dark chocolate with mint flavoured green swirls, topped with white chocolate sprinkles, Mint Matchmakers and Mint Aero Balls. Now as mummy I never really get much to myself but this piece had to be mine, a lover of Minty Chocolate this slice did not disappoint, with the smoothness of the dark chocolate and the minty swirls every mouthful was a chocolate lovers dream.

I’m sure you will all agree, so many delicious flavours and all very tasty.  Although as a mummy with a Nut Allergy I was excluded from tasting two of the slices.  But the whole Mission family agreed it was the most delicious Pizza’s we have ever tasted.

So what are you waiting for pop on over to boxchoc - home of the chocolate pizza and order yours today.

You can opt to have a mixed Pizza like mine or even a pizza made up of just your favourites, you decided.

They also have an Easter Pizza, which is the cutest thing ever and would make a nice alternative to an Easter egg.

Pop on over to@boxchoc on Twitter and say Hi and make sure you have a good look around the website too.

Kids do the funniest things with Sudocrem!

As a mum of four little people, I know how expensive days out can be.  So when I was asked by the lovely people at Sudocrem to work with them to promote their Facebook competition “Kids do the funniest things” I jumped at the chance to help.

Sudocrem is a worldwide named product, and it has helped millions of people over its 80 year history.  Winning countless awards from Baby Magazines to Product reviews the people at Sudocrem are proud of what they do.

It has helped my children in so many different ways and it can be used for a number of different ailments such as Cuts and grazes, Minor burns, Sunburn Eczema, Acne, Bed sores, Chilblains.

We have a tub in our Camping first aid box, as well as our First aid box at home and there is even a tiny tub in my make up bad for those cold sore break outs.  It has so many uses and I personally can’t live without it.

So to celebrate the launch of Sudocrem’s shiny new website they are offering a 12 month Merlin Family Pass worth almost £400 to the winning mum or dad who shares with them their child’s (under 3) funniest photograph with the story behind it.

(Please note submissions must not relate in any way to the use of Sudocrem Antiseptic Healing Cream.)

All you have to do to enter is visit, and ‘like’ the page and then share your child’s funniest photograph with the story behind it.   It couldn’t be simpler and we all have funny photographs of our kids around the house.  So as long as your child is aged 3 and under and the photograph does NOT include Sudocrem or any other licensed medicine you are free to enter. (Make sure you check out the terms and conditions at the bottom of the blog)

Be sure to follow Sudocrem for their latest updates on Twitter

And check out their blog too

Read the competition Terms and Conditions here:

And what your pass will include can be found here