Kids have this unbelievable knack of saying the wrong things at the wrong times. Well maybe not the wrong things. It’s just case that they haven’t heard the saying engage the brain before you open your mouth. I'm guilty of this too you know.
Take Little Princess for a prime example, she is always doing it.
We were once in Asda, browsing in the cake aisle (as you do) when princess spotted a lady that was a little over weight shall we say. She was buying weight watchers cakes. Princess looked at me and announced to the whole aisle “why is that lady buying low fat cakes?” trying hard to shut her up I told her “maybe she is on a diet” Princess shook her head and said “don’t you think it’s a bit late for that” . We made a quick exit from the cake aisle.
Another example was a quick trip to boots, Princess again. We were looking at the skin care when a nice man who was dressed as a lady (politically correct term fails me) was also looking at wrinkle creams. Holding no punches, Princess said “Mummy, why is that man dressed as a lady?” The lady/man looked at me, I couldn’t explain. So I said “well people dress in different ways sweetie.” Thinking she would be happy with that explanation, we moved down the aisle, but no that wasn’t good enough for Princess as she went on to say “well if he wants to be a lady, he should have had a shave first!” Oh ground open up please, biting my lip trying hard not to burst out laughing, we moved out of the aisle.
Princess still not content, with the lady/man. She told the shop assistant “There is a man dressed as a lady over there; you should show him were all the lady stuff is because he isn’t fooling anyone”.
Kids also have a knack of repeating things you really didn’t think they heard you say.
Like one of my neighbours, is well let’s say has a very lived in face. When talking to the neighbour one day, Princess again was staring at this neighbour, so much so the neighbour stopped talking to me and asked Princess was she ok?
Princess replied “yes I’m fine thank you; I am just looking to see what lives in your face?” Pardon the said neighbour replied “well my mummy said you had a lived in face and I just wanted to see what lived in it?” Bright red and full of apologise, explaining she overheard me talking about someone else with the same name as her.
I couldn’t get away quick enough.
So you can imagine my surprise, when this morning Monster started to copy his sisters knack of dropping mummy in it.
Walking home from school, we have a lot of older people who always say good morning and smile. So when a rather grumpier old man walked towards us, Monster was quick to comment “Look at the state of his face?” praying he wasn’t talking about the grumpy old man I asked “who’s face sweetie?” “His face” he shouted pointing at the man walking towards us. I couldn’t look the man in the eye. I told monster it was rude to point and shout, he said “well look at him the miserable bugger”.
I could have died!
I have a few more years yet before Monster and Princess grow out of this not engaging the brain process, so until then I will be keeping them under lock and key.
Lots of love