Sunday, 5 June 2011

Love and Marriage



It has been a lovely long weekend in the Mission Household; we went to a beautiful wedding on Friday (just me and daddy all alone).  It felt very strange, having four kids the only alone time we have is when we are in bed at night and that’s for about 5 minutes before one of us (normally me falls asleep).

But spending some alone time together was quite nice, I know I moan about him a lot and he can be a proper pain in the bum, but we had an amazing time together.  Watching the bride and groom looking so in love, all the guests were having an amazing time and then something caught the corner of my eye.

It was Daddy Mission looking at me, I looked around just to check there wasn’t some gorgeous woman standing beside me, and nope he was definitely looking at me.   I asked him what was wrong.  He smiled and said “Nothing’s wrong”  I didn’t believe him so I nipped to the loo to make sure my hair wasn’t sticking up, or that I didn’t have lipstick on my teeth.  Everything was fine, so what was he looking at.

I went back into the reception just in time for the first dance; the way the bride and groom looked at each other was so lovely.  Then it dawned on me, the last time I remember him looking at me like that was our wedding 8 years ago.

I remember it so well, we had such a beautiful day, I didn’t want our wedding to ever end, but that’s a bride’s prerogative.

At the end of the night, we chatted all the way home it was probably the first time in ages we actually got to talk without someone interrupting us.  Don’t get me wrong I would NEVER be without the kids, but it was nice to catch up and chat.

Sadly the flip side to the weekend, was finding out that friends of ours are getting a divorce.  They had been married for about 15 years and been together for about 20 years.  It was heartbreaking, they were such an amazing couple, well respected, they adored each other and everyone could see that.

Apparently he had his head turned by a younger, slimmer model.  I don’t know how any man could turn his back on 3 beautiful albeit grown up children, and a loving wife after 20 years of being together.  I know I probably shouldn’t blame this younger model but I do, apparently she chased him, sending 20 texts a day, following him around like a puppy dog.  He is just as much to blame, for falling for this woman.

But I just DONT get it, why?  Why when you know someone is married, do you pursue the person? 

When I was younger my nan used to say “If you meet a man and he is already with someone, no matter how unhappy he says he is just WALK AWAY”.  She was right, a few years later I met a man, he was charming and very sweet, he actually made my head spin, but once I found out he had a girl friend, it didn’t matter how charming he was, I walked away.  A few years later I found out he had cheated on his Girlfriend about 30 times.

I think what I am trying to say is life has a funny way of turning out sometimes.  I would love to say that we will be together forever, when we got married it was forever, but people change.  How do I know some younger or older model, prettier and slimmer than me (that’s not hard) isn’t going to pursue my husband?

But what I do want to say is I adore my husband, I don’t tell him very often that I do, but we tell each other every day that we love each other, he still holds my hand when out walking and he still looks at me like he did when we first met 14 years ago.

He still kisses me on the head when I’m asleep (I know this because he wakes me up) and he sends the cutest texts in the world when I’m not expecting them.

To him I am eternally grateful for him being the main breadwinner of our family, he has given me four amazing little people and he has nursed me when I have been ill.  He is my true hero, my soul mate and my one true love (in fact I still get butterflies when I see him).

If anyone ever tried to turn his head, I would hope he would remember that I may not be slim, sexy anymore, but those lines on my tummy mark every nine months I carried our children, the little lumps and bumps I have on my body are from the extra weight I still can’t shift from carrying the children and those lines under my eyes are from the sleepless nights.

I’m still the same person he fell in love with 14 years ago, smile and all.  Every day I count my blessings that I have him in my life, and I hope he still feels the same way.

6 comments:

  1. What a lovely post and I think your right on all counts:- the walking away if someone is already attached and re. the stretch marks. x

    ReplyDelete
  2. You are sooo right. Anyone attatched shpould be left alone, not chased. They usually have a lot more to lose. I have been married 17yrs and after reading your post I reminded myself of what my OH puts up with and what he does for me!!

    Great post x

    ReplyDelete
  3. Awww Le, that is lovely. I agree with the attached thing, so many people out there that have no morals though or sense of loyalty, so sad. I've never married my Jamie, but he is still mine. We have been through rough patches (probably more than most) but we came through them and are still together 17 years later! Hope some of the moral-less people read your post, it might make them think twice before they go chasing someone elses man/woman. x

    ReplyDelete
  4. Aaah what a lovely post i'm the same about my hubby I often have a whinge but i'd truely be lost without him. So sorry to hear about you're friends. I'm sure he will regret it very soon x

    ReplyDelete
  5. It sounds like you are both very lucky. Time away from the kids is lovely as you get to concentrate on each other again without the hassles of housework.

    A lovely post (apart from the silly man who is leaving his wife!)

    ReplyDelete